So let's start with my real family. My parents are probably two of the nicest and most welcoming people that anyone could meet. They are friendly and can hold a conversation with anyone. Even if they didn't like someone, you would never know it...well until the relationship is over that is. In all fairness, I think they only dislike exes because they were in some way a douche and broke up with me and obviously they are "team Janet." If that is the case then you most certainly don't want to be caught by my dad at a restaurant with the girl that you broke up with me for. That could get a little awkward. Not that the dude didn't deserve it. He's probably lucky it was my dad and not my mom. My sister is much the same. She is my sister and very easy to get along with and sweet to everyone. As a general rule, if I like them...my family usually likes them. My real family is usually the first of my families that the person I am dating would meet. I know this seems backwards...but really, there is no need to freak out about it being all serious. It is totally casual.
Next up would be my ninja family. They are behind my family in the "nice" factor. I know the guys (and girl) at my ninja gym would be open to anyone that I would bring there. However, their skills make them a bit more intimidating. I would want to make sure that the guy was very confident, or at least okay, with being humbled before taking him to my ninja gym. I would hate for him to feel totally emasculated by not being able to swing from ball to ball...
The next family would be my "royal family." I'm sure you all have seen posts on Facebook and wondered what the hell the "royal family" was. Well, to explain, it was something we made up over a few cocktails when we were making fun of some people who were a little full of themselves. I know that's not nice, but neither is making your friends call you "Dr. Suzy" when addressing you because you're an acupuncturist. Get over yourself. Anyway, this is my family of besties basically. They have seen me through thick and thin and everything in between. That also means that they have seen a lot of douche bags come in and out of my life. This is probably why they are so hard on the outside...they have had years to become extra protective of me. My friends are genuine and I really appreciate that about them. However, if they don't like someone they aren't afraid to honestly tell them what they think of the way they treated me. Basically, if a guy wants to stick around, he should most definitely not get on their bad side. Also, as per royal requirements, we take at least 50 pictures per gathering so he has to be okay with that as well.
Well, we are at the last of my families. This does not mean that they are the least important. But it does mean that they may well be the last people that someone I am dating would meet. That family is the 5:15 AM class at my CrossFit gym. Many people ask me all the time, "How do you get up at 4:30 in the morning to go to the gym?!" The answer is simple, "To see my friends and laugh my ass off." The 5:15 class is very close-knit and I have known most of these peeps for close to 4 years. When you spend the first hour every day with them, it becomes very comparable to a little family. There are also many roles played out in this family from our sweet CrossFit grandpa, to our CrossFit dad (who is usually the one dropping F bombs left and right in the corner and trying to crack the garage door every chance he gets...even when it's 20 degrees outside). A guy would need to be able to vocalize some profanities at some point in a conversation with CrossFit dad. I never had a big brother...but I think if I did, they would be much like the rest of the guys of the 5:15 class that enjoy harassing me. And of course there is the ring leader of all of them; he is mischievous, and a prankster who enjoys past times like throwing spiders at people. Overall, the guys' bark is much worse than their bite. If I ever introduce a guy to them he better have a great sense of humor or he won't survive. Now for my 5:15 girls (all two of them). They are quite the opposite of my "brothers." These girls' bite is much worse than their bark. They are super sweet and friendly...But if someone ever did me wrong I would be worried if I were them. I took a self-defense class with one of them and I was a little concerned she was taking her role playing a little too seriously. The other one, I have been on the receiving end of many a "friendly" slap on the ass...that bruised me. If I were a guy dating me, these are the two 5:15 family members that I would be afraid of. I had an awesome Christmas family portrait I was going to post, but since "Carl" requested a fake name, I figured I wouldn't post any pictures. The guys might not want to be associated with my blog.
I guess there are a few lessons in this blog post. Guys need to stop freaking out if a girl introduces them to her family. It's not a big deal unless you meet ALL her families. And if a guy ever survives meeting all my families then he may be a keeper. Now if he ever does me wrong, he's got a lot of people to be worried about.